1) The ubiquity of access to texting, facebook and twitter.
2) No direct consequences for bullying through texting, facebook or twitter.
3) An increased divorce rate, resulting in single parent families that leave teenaged girls relatively unsupervised.
4) The decline of the "stay at home Mom (or Dad)", with both parents' attention engaged at work and not in their daughters.
5) The fact that girls are physically, but not mentally, maturing younger and looking much older than they are between their ears. This is a virtual recipe for poor self esteem.
6) The decline of the community: people no longer know their neighbours. Community support with "friends" in the community is increasingly a thing of the past. People are, now more than ever, living like islands unto themselves. Group support and self policing of kids.
7) Teachers that have been increasingly marginalized by a growing culture of entitlement that does not let teachers discipline kids when it is necessary.
8) A second generation of people that have no idea about how to impart a culture of discipline, honour and respect to their kids - because their parents never taught them these lessons either.
9) An increasingly common belief by uninformed parents that their teenagers are entitled to privacy in their lives and correspondences via twitter, facebook and texting.
10) Parents find it difficult to view their teenage daughters objectively.
It is easy for these teenage girl bullies to do their damage through texting, facebook and twitter.
Bullying from afar through a digital medium is easy, because consequences are rare.
When I grew up, if you said something rude to a person - or within earshot of a person - you risked being rightfully punched in the nose. This doesn't happen any more. There are no consequences for an evil Facebook post, twitter post or text. Broken noses are getting more rare as bullying is getting more common!
It is now safer than ever to be a bully. Consequences are rare, and you can do it safely at home from the couch.
An unbelievable number of teenaged girls are living with one parent after their parents divorce. Inevitably, one or more of these parents ends up in a new relationship - and tends to focus on that relationship rather than their teenager, in the false belief (or hope) that "the kids are older now, and don't need my attention so much any more".
Even when their parents are "still married", an amazing number of teenaged girls are completely unsupervised. Their parents are both working in demanding jobs, and one of them may have returned to work after years of being home for the kids. The parents believe - erroneously - that their teenaged girls no longer need so much time and attention.
Nothing could be further from the truth. Teenaged girls are more insecure than ever in history. Their parents may not know that their teenaged girl is a bully.....or being bullied.
The fact is that - the cause of being a bully is insecurity. And the cause of being bullied is insecurity.
So where does this insecurity come from?
In short - insecurity comes from everywhere. It is inevitable - and each girl will respond to it differently. Their only hope is their parents and guardians (because friends at this age tend to come and go) - who they NEED to provide guidance. When girls don't have parents or guardians that can defend them from insecurity.....these girls need more resources. A friend, a friend's parent(s), a teacher, a counsellor, a clergy person, etc.
If your teenaged girls are getting bullied, try these books & sources:
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The decline of the community: people no longer know their neighbours.
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